The thief of Joy!
Good morning Planet Famers!
I hope you all had a great week, and of course an even better weekend!
I apologize for the delay in posting again! Life just seems to be ever getting in the way! Work has just been so busy, and it's all..well mostly good! Any problems or issues right now are certainly good problems to have! New clients, new projects, completely new ventures, and or course life is always happening! Let's just say I am not a person that is "lacking something to do"! haha
That said, it brings me around to the topic, or rather the subject matter that brought this topic to mind. My Hope is that you might find a little tidbit of wisdom or perspective that you can use for your own life. Or at the very least, get you to think about your own life and perspectives.
As I mentioned, I have been pretty busy! Work has been just crazy, and while I stated that the problems I have are all "good problems", they are often still problems. Taking on new clients and new projects is always a wonderful thing. I enjoy the challenge and the thrill of taking something new one. With that, comes added demands on my time, and added stress and challenges. I know I do this to myself, and most of the time I have no issue with it. As I said, I enjoy the challenges.
Every now and then, I can start to feel a bit stretched. Like saltwater taffy pulled to thin, or to borrow from Lord of The Rings "like butter scraped across too much bread". (I watched them this weekend! lol). I can start to feel tired, which then causes me to be irritable and short tempered. What is worse, and is the topic of this blog, is that that feeling of being "pulled to thin" or "scraped across too much bread" can ultimately invite into my thoughts and feelings, The Thief of Joy.
President Theodore Roosevelt ~ or First Lady Eleanor Roosevelt (depending on your source) ~ said: "Comparison is the thief of joy"
This is one of my all time favorite quotes/saying, because I believe it is one of the truest and most accurate quotes I have ever heard. Every time I allow the mindset of comparison into my life, I immediately begin to lose the joy and satisfaction in my life. When I see my friends, or even people I do not like, doing things or having fun, I begin to have thoughts like: "I wish I could go play on the beach all day", "I wish my parents had a lot of money so I don't have to work". Comparison can even creep into my thoughts when I am doing a good deed!
I often take my friends, and those new to sobriety out to eat at nice places and then pay for them. It's one of the ways I choose to give back, and show them that their life can get better. When comparison sneaks into my life, I can find myself feeling resentful because: "I wish somebody would take me out to dinner and pay for me all the time." It's a completely irrational thought, because I do it by choice! It's my way of giving back and helping others, yet if my thoughts come from that place of comparison..I can build a resentment. So now, not only am I comparing myself to others and losing my joy that way. I am also losing the joy I get from doing something nice for someone else! Nobody forced me to take them out, and nobody forced me to pay, yet there I am..resenting them for my act of kindness! Comparison is The Thief of Joy!
So what do you do? How does a person keep comparison at bay? Especially in a culture where we are all constantly being compared and encouraged to "keep up with the Johnson's"? Here are a few tips that I use and some things I try to remember, and I hope you find them helpful.
1. We are all human ~ I have to remind myself that we are all human. We each have our own struggles, and what I am seeing that is stealing my joy is only part of their story.
2. That I am in control of my feelings ~ A wise man once said, "nobody can make you feel something, without your consent." No one person can, or should, have the ability to steal your joy or make you feel less than. If they do, you need to examine that relationship, because it is unhealthy.
3. My journey ~ I must remember that each person is living their own life, and is on their own journey. I don't want someone else's journey, I want my own.
4. It's my choice ~ Ultimately, this is my life. I am responsible for my own choices, and if I am not happy with where my life is at, it is on me to make the necessary changes until I am.
5. It's my Joy! ~ I am the one that decides what makes me happy and brings me joy! I don't want a 20,000sq ft home...so why should it bother me that someone else has one? Often when we compare, we forget to ask ourselves a very simple question: Do I even want what they have? Often, the answer is no!
6. Joy is a decision ~ I believe that being a joyful person, is a decision a person makes in their life. You make the choice to be happy, long before you leave your house in the morning. Yes you may have a bad day, yes bad things will happen to you, but making the decision to be a joyful person is bigger than that. It is bigger than a bad day. Being joyful, is a way of interacting with the world, and the people, around you. You may have a bad day, and that's ok! You may feel sad, angry, lost, scared, whatever! What matters is the decision you have made, and not allowing yourself to stay in those other places.
Now, remember number 1! We are ALL human! Remember to count yourself in there! Often we are the most unforgiving, and hardest, on ourselves. I don't get this right everyday. You won't either! The point is that we try our best. Life isn't about perfection. Life is about being a little bit better today than you were yesterday, and a little bit better tomorrow than you are today!
Comparison truly is like a thief in the night. If you aren't careful, it will sneak in and it will quickly steal your joy. Don't let it! Remember that this is your life and your journey, so what kind of life do you want to have?
Until next time Planet Famers! Create your joy, and guard it with every fiber of your being! :-)
I hope you all had a great week, and of course an even better weekend!
I apologize for the delay in posting again! Life just seems to be ever getting in the way! Work has just been so busy, and it's all..well mostly good! Any problems or issues right now are certainly good problems to have! New clients, new projects, completely new ventures, and or course life is always happening! Let's just say I am not a person that is "lacking something to do"! haha
That said, it brings me around to the topic, or rather the subject matter that brought this topic to mind. My Hope is that you might find a little tidbit of wisdom or perspective that you can use for your own life. Or at the very least, get you to think about your own life and perspectives.
As I mentioned, I have been pretty busy! Work has been just crazy, and while I stated that the problems I have are all "good problems", they are often still problems. Taking on new clients and new projects is always a wonderful thing. I enjoy the challenge and the thrill of taking something new one. With that, comes added demands on my time, and added stress and challenges. I know I do this to myself, and most of the time I have no issue with it. As I said, I enjoy the challenges.
Every now and then, I can start to feel a bit stretched. Like saltwater taffy pulled to thin, or to borrow from Lord of The Rings "like butter scraped across too much bread". (I watched them this weekend! lol). I can start to feel tired, which then causes me to be irritable and short tempered. What is worse, and is the topic of this blog, is that that feeling of being "pulled to thin" or "scraped across too much bread" can ultimately invite into my thoughts and feelings, The Thief of Joy.
President Theodore Roosevelt ~ or First Lady Eleanor Roosevelt (depending on your source) ~ said: "Comparison is the thief of joy"
This is one of my all time favorite quotes/saying, because I believe it is one of the truest and most accurate quotes I have ever heard. Every time I allow the mindset of comparison into my life, I immediately begin to lose the joy and satisfaction in my life. When I see my friends, or even people I do not like, doing things or having fun, I begin to have thoughts like: "I wish I could go play on the beach all day", "I wish my parents had a lot of money so I don't have to work". Comparison can even creep into my thoughts when I am doing a good deed!
I often take my friends, and those new to sobriety out to eat at nice places and then pay for them. It's one of the ways I choose to give back, and show them that their life can get better. When comparison sneaks into my life, I can find myself feeling resentful because: "I wish somebody would take me out to dinner and pay for me all the time." It's a completely irrational thought, because I do it by choice! It's my way of giving back and helping others, yet if my thoughts come from that place of comparison..I can build a resentment. So now, not only am I comparing myself to others and losing my joy that way. I am also losing the joy I get from doing something nice for someone else! Nobody forced me to take them out, and nobody forced me to pay, yet there I am..resenting them for my act of kindness! Comparison is The Thief of Joy!
So what do you do? How does a person keep comparison at bay? Especially in a culture where we are all constantly being compared and encouraged to "keep up with the Johnson's"? Here are a few tips that I use and some things I try to remember, and I hope you find them helpful.
1. We are all human ~ I have to remind myself that we are all human. We each have our own struggles, and what I am seeing that is stealing my joy is only part of their story.
2. That I am in control of my feelings ~ A wise man once said, "nobody can make you feel something, without your consent." No one person can, or should, have the ability to steal your joy or make you feel less than. If they do, you need to examine that relationship, because it is unhealthy.
3. My journey ~ I must remember that each person is living their own life, and is on their own journey. I don't want someone else's journey, I want my own.
4. It's my choice ~ Ultimately, this is my life. I am responsible for my own choices, and if I am not happy with where my life is at, it is on me to make the necessary changes until I am.
5. It's my Joy! ~ I am the one that decides what makes me happy and brings me joy! I don't want a 20,000sq ft home...so why should it bother me that someone else has one? Often when we compare, we forget to ask ourselves a very simple question: Do I even want what they have? Often, the answer is no!
6. Joy is a decision ~ I believe that being a joyful person, is a decision a person makes in their life. You make the choice to be happy, long before you leave your house in the morning. Yes you may have a bad day, yes bad things will happen to you, but making the decision to be a joyful person is bigger than that. It is bigger than a bad day. Being joyful, is a way of interacting with the world, and the people, around you. You may have a bad day, and that's ok! You may feel sad, angry, lost, scared, whatever! What matters is the decision you have made, and not allowing yourself to stay in those other places.
Now, remember number 1! We are ALL human! Remember to count yourself in there! Often we are the most unforgiving, and hardest, on ourselves. I don't get this right everyday. You won't either! The point is that we try our best. Life isn't about perfection. Life is about being a little bit better today than you were yesterday, and a little bit better tomorrow than you are today!
Comparison truly is like a thief in the night. If you aren't careful, it will sneak in and it will quickly steal your joy. Don't let it! Remember that this is your life and your journey, so what kind of life do you want to have?
Until next time Planet Famers! Create your joy, and guard it with every fiber of your being! :-)
Comments